Some days you just need a little encouragement, ya know? There are times that I feel like I am the only one who knows what I am going through and no one is even capable of empathizing; much less sympathize. Those thoughts usually come on my pity party days! Sometimes, though, especially in the middle of a pity party, God will gently nudge me or send me a soft reminder that I have special people in my live who do empathize with me. I have a beautiful friend, Jessica, who is so close to my heart. We are the kind of friends who can go for months without talking and then pick right back up like we never missed a beat. I had the honor of standing beside her in her wedding last fall, and she has just welcomed a beautiful baby girl, Makaela Jane. We were corresponding yesterday, catching up on each other's lives, and she wrote to me:
"I hope things start falling in place for you soon. I know they will eventually, it's just hard to wait for eventually to come! "
Those words were just what I needed to hear at that moment. As you know me, you know that I am person who stays busy. I'm always doing something or taking on some new project or task, whether at work, at home, or anywhere else I can find it. I do that because I do not like to sit around and think too much. I do not like to have too much time on my hands, because my mind wanders and I never know where it will lead me. I desire more than anything else to be a wife and a mother. I desire to make a large scale impact on under served populations in the community, especially children. I desire to help other mothers and fathers become the best parents they can be. I have so many desires, and so much that I want to do......eventually.
Where I struggle is that I do not think my "eventually" is contingent upon myself solely. I know there are things I need to be doing along the way, of course. What I get tripped up on is the feeling that I am waiting on God to help things 'fall into place'; especially with the husband and kids part.
So, thank you Jess for your encouraging words and your reminder. It helps to know that others are as aware of the frustration that accompanies waiting for "eventually".
Here's a picture of Jess (left), Lindsay, and myself the weekend of Jess's wedding. (Pardon the fact that I look sunburned - it was cold and windburn!)