Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Just Listen, Rebecca!

If you know me, you can imagine I have heard that line a million times in my life. I figure there are two main times a person is told to/urged to listen - when a solution is needed, or when a mistake is made. Honestly, I don't like to listen, unless I ask a question. When it comes to the first scenario - when a solution is needed - I am a problem solver; a figure-it-out-er. I would rather come up with my own solution than listen to someone else's. To be honest, I usually think my solution is best anyway. Not to be arrogant, but I rarely make rash decisions, I look at situations from multiple angles, and often times I can look at a situation and figure out a solution by just looking at it. When it comes to the other scenario - when a mistake has been made -I'll just be honest again - I don't like my mistakes pointed out. I'm sure I have some deep psychological issue that leads to this, but from my perspective, I'm a perfectionist. I take my actions seriously, and I do everything I can to keep from making a mistake, and when I do make mistakes (which is often - I may be honest, but I'm not delusional!), I usually catch them quickly.

So, all that being said, I don't like to listen. I'm not very good at it - just ask my parents! So these last few weeks have been very interesting for me. I have been hearing god's voice in some of the most obscure places and circumstances. What is so interesting about it is that all during college and my early adulthood, I remember being so frustrated because people would always say they 'heard' God's voice. I never felt like I experienced that. Sure, I would recognize things in readings or could hear through another person's words or teachings, but I always felt like I was on the outside of something that everyone else had experienced. It was very frustrating for me, and I even read books on the topic of 'hearing God'. Then, for a few years after that, I stopped trying to listen all together. I was frustrated with my life circumstances, and I figured that if I hadn't heard him before then, it just wasn't going to happen. Silly, me!

Suffice it to say, some major things have been going on in my world lately, and I could not imagine trying to make the decisions I had had to make without listening! What has truly blown me away about the whole process is that I have been given a peace about much more than I could have every imagined. It is amazing what happens when you just listen!

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